yesterday I made a mathematical error... I divided a number from another number. the wrong number. simple mathematical error. one that my boss was depending on. that "number" went into board room meetings, carrying with it hope, and expectation.
once the error was found, hope was deferred...and made my heart sink, at least, if not everyone else's...
so, I was given the opportunity to correct the number, correct the mistake, and still am working on correcting my mindset regarding the situation.
i know it is not the end of the world. i like to think that i am dependable and reliable. once i realized the weight of my error, i began to question my ability in myself, in my ability to do my job, and do it well...
i was late for work today. i wanted to disappear from my problems. i wanted to be far away from any responsibility, anything that resembles reality. this kind of thing helps me understand why people mask their pain with alcohol or drugs. i get it.
so here i am at work facing the reality that i am mediocre at my job at best, and that i will never have what it takes to be a ceo or executive....did i mention that this mathematical error falls on the heels of another event last week, last friday to be exact? i was caught sleeping on the job by said boss, in which there's an incriminating video floating around...
yeah...definitely not a record month for me so far...
1 comment:
We can't all be good at everything; give yourself a break! You're an excellent employee--dependable, smart, capable, efficient and caring. That organization is better because of you. (And I can say that from experience.)
I'm not the only one who feels this way, either.
I've rarely seen anyone work as hard as you do. You've carried more than your share for a long time. I think you deserve a nap now and then!
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