i am about to be a divorcee(where's the line over the e on the keypad? I never know). I think this is the first time I've blogged about this topic. why? perhaps out of fear, perhaps I avoid topics that make me uncomfortable...like bathroom humor...gross...
Today, I discussed my impending situation with someone who is new on this....journey? journey of divorce. I was able to "guide" them in the ways of filing...and in the ways of emotion. I have experienced every emotion possible. I still am. emotional.
This is so difficult for me to write about. I am fine in having conversations...hell, what am I saying. I don't even really enjoy discussing the process....I know it is sometimes necessary. I only feel completely comfortable with discussing it with people who have or who are going through it.
Being empathetic, maybe I find it easy to "feel" what they are going through. I think the deeper truth is that I want someone to empathize with what I am feeling...it's hard to understand something you've never experienced.
I love people, but sometimes I fear becoming a loner. I need people in my life. I know this, and even want this....sometimes, it's just easier to be alone.
I am switching locations at the office job. I am moving from the "mail room" which is assumed to be a lame place to be, to a corner cubicle with windows letting in the sunshine...
One would assume that I would absolutely LOVE this new location, but I honestly am a little apprehensive, as I wonder if this will turn me into the person who just "hides" in her cubie...?
hmmm...I do have some wonderful co-workers who probably won't allow that to happen!
4 comments:
What's sad is that it's not at all hard to find people that either are divorced or are getting divorced.
I'm shocked at how many women share my (our) story, especially in the Christian community. Down to the very details of my situation: Man absconds his responsibility as a husband/father in favor of a life unaccountable to anyone. Ouch.
I've seriously begun to doubt whether true love ever exists between humans. The only love we can really count on comes from God.
This process has turned me into such a cynic.
you're right about women who share our story...it seems like every woman that I talk to who is or has gone through this, that is the case...the husband is unaccountable, or simply withdraws from people.
I have found myself becoming cynical as well; at least for myself. I still get giddy at newlyweds, or newly engaged couples...I just don't ever expect to be one of those again.
PS: Which cube are they giving you? It would be so neat if it were my old one. Good vibes and all that!
sorry to say nope. i am getting the one in the corner behind ernie wit! it does have a great view!
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